February 24, 2007

We Are the World

Remember Grace & Albert on Carver Creek? They finally got to read, Dusty Angels and Old Diaries this week. We’ve kept in touch all these years as each of us have moved through and down the path of life. It’s been many, many years since we saw them last, and I doubt we will ever meet again since they are all the way across the country. Grace sent a note telling how, as she read the book to Albert, many old memories flooded back. (She read the chapter, Walkabout Carver Creek first!) I hope they were all good memories!

Here’s an apology and a hug for all the complaining I’ve been doing about my job. How many don’t have any work at all? Today I got a note from a good friend asking for a couple more books. A friend of hers lost her job two weeks ago – AFTER her husband was shipped to Iraq! They want a book for STRONG women! We wish them well as they are in our thoughts.

At my second job, I’m doing private duty for a small baby. This morning, I opened the refrigerator to put in my lunch and thought it must be broken because there was nothing in it! How much do we waste everyday? How much do we take for granted? They have so little and do not complain.

The baby needs a rocking chair. In the hospital where he’s been for over six months, they had a rocking chair that the mother used to rock him to sleep. Now he cries for hours, and she rocks her body back and forth until I know she must hurt all over trying to get him to sleep. I’ve posted an ad on Craig’s List for a rocking chair. (I told her I knew a ‘friend’ who had a rocking chair.) Her husband works 12 hours every day (min wage, I’m sure) and she can’t work because of the baby. She’s selling Avon to help make ends meet, so if you want Avon – let me know.

Well, that’s my thoughts for today. Now I’m going to do what Billy loves to do on a cold rainy afternoon....
I’m going to take a nap!

Take Care on the Journey,

February 23, 2007

Angel Nurse On the Run

The snow is melting and temps are rising here in the Ohio Valley. The only snow left untouched is the entrance to EnglishRose Photography where business is absolutely zero during the cold winter days!

I haven’t checked my main email box because I know there’s at least 300 messages there and that darn delete clicker takes 8-10 seconds to activate. Let’s see, 300 messages at 10 seconds each would take 8.3 hours to delete all my messages one at a time. (Who would believe I failed Algebra at Columbus State?)

Before I get into my story for today, I must tell you about the newest addition to the family. My old cell phone wasn’t charging properly so I went in to see Cingular about a new update. (Any excuse will do.) Wow did I update.

Let’s see. Not only did I get a new flip-phone in my favorite color of soft golden red, but it’s features include bluetooth, camera, instant messaging, e-mail, alarms, calculator (not used for the above calculation), world time (for when Billy and Katy take another trip), file viewer, name card, MMS, photo caller ID, speaker phone and web browser! (Now if I could just get that bluetooth thing to stay in my ear!)

Of course, what I like best is to be able to wake up in the morning and flip open my phone, press a button and see the current outside temperature! 10 degrees! Sheba will have to wait awhile! Remember when we used to look out the window to check the temperture outside?

While I was changing phones, I asked about combining home phone service, internet service and cell phone. Done! Saving of at least $75 a month! Did you know there’s a plan now for long distance on the home phone for $2 a month you can have LD for 10 cents a minute for those few times you don’t want to pick up the cell phone and use the unlimited long distance there. (Or, hubby doesn’t know how to make a long distance call on his cell phone and you don’t want to leave him devoid making any LD calls.) In the past, to get long distance at all on the home phone, one had to pay for the full service!

If you have some time to put your feet up on your desk or go get a favorite drink to sip (which most of us don’t – but do it anyway), I’ll tell you a story about work yesterday and weave you into my world for a few minutes.

As I entered the front door last night - thirteen hours after I had left for work - I was greeted not only by my dog doing flips in my favorite chair, but to an ever so slight odor of hot plastic. I knew in an instant that Jim had used one of the plastic plates to warm supper in the oven again.

Growling ever so slightly I said, “How am I ever going to teach you not to put that plastic plate in the oven?”

“It’s not hot, It’s only on warm,” he protested.

And right then I knew I had spoiled what he had spent hours preparing for my homecoming. He had gone to the grocery and picked out all my favorite foods – and more! The only task left was for me to decide if I wanted lima beans or asparagus?

But now I had kicked the surprise in the pants. He sat down heavily in his favorite chair with a deep sigh and distanced himself by staring at the TV. We ate supper in more silence than is usual, and Sheba didn’t know who to beg from because neither of us were giving her tid-bits.

“Did you hear from the maintenance job?”


“Guess you didn’t get the job?”


“I’m sorry. We’ll be okay. I’m working two jobs now and don’t have a day off for the next 6 weeks.”

That didn’t sound as encouraging as I had hoped it would.

“So, did you turn in your 2-week notice at work today?”


“I didn’t get my vacation pay like I expected. And for some reason, my supervisor is being real nice to me. I'm really confused about what to do. What if the second job can’t give me enough hours?”

Reflecting on the full day at my nursing job, I wondered if I’m going crazy to even doubt my decision to quit. The last four hours were awful to say the least.

That updated computer program I’ve been writing and complaining about? I was right! It IS the beta version, and they expected to have to ‘work out the bugs”. !!!!! (Another name for “cheap”?)

I was right again in that no one knows how to work it. No one knows how to fix it (except one IT man who has to bounce between two facilities) and no one knows when things will ever be normal again!

Back to the IT man (sorry I don’t know your name). I’ve seen him glued to the computer screens at work for the last couple weeks. Someone told me that he is also an RN. Can you believe that? A computer man who’s also a nurse? Almost sounds like hubby James. An accountant who has a degree in computer science!

So, yesterday at work he comes around with this message that if our medicine list suddenly turned red on the computer screen, we are to call him immediately. What he didn’t say was that our computer would be immediately removed, and we would revert without notice to the “paper method” of passing our meds and doing our charting.

Of course, it was my medicine cart computer that was the first to turn the letters RED! Suddenly the IT guy is taking out the screws that hold my computer to my med cart and he’s walking away with my world in his hands!

Scrambling to lift the 50-pound medicine book and figure out where I was on the med pass and who still needed pain meds and who needed insulin shots and who still needed accuchecks, I thought about that 2-week notice still in my nurses bag.

“*#!**!!* I’m going to kill myself. I’m just going to kill myself.”

That’s not me talking. I don’t talk that way at work anyway. It’s my supervisor. She’s running down the hall waving some paperwork.

“We’re getting two admissions. Why can’t they make up their mind? They said we weren’t getting one this late. Now we’re getting two!” *%*+*!!***.

I’m already in trouble with my aide because I’m not answering call lights fast enough. She sounds like she is sick with the flu, but the other aide went home stating that she was here to fill in for another aide and was not going to work more than 8 hours. She walked out the door at 3 p.m. and the scheduler said there was no one to replace her.

I’m sure glad I worked this hall yesterday because by now I have nothing organized on paper, computer or on the unit. It’s almost 5 p.m and an agency nurse is coming in at 6:30 p.m.

I sure do want to go home on time1 My back hurts so badly I can’t lean over to open the bottom drawer of the med cart where the breathing treatments are. I open it with my foot and grab everybody’s inhalers out and lay them on the top of the cart! I try not to complain about my chronic back at work. Occasionally someone notices during narcotic count because we have to lean over to the bottom drawer to count and the other nurse has to help me straighten back up! But that’s another story.

Admission number 1 is rolling down the hall on a medic’s cart groaning loudly.

“Why did I ever leave Montana? Where am I? Lord. Just take me home. I’m ready.”

“I know it’s not your job because she came in so late. But could you do the admission on paper and I’ll put it in the computer tomorrow? Since we have agency, do the second admission too. Thank-you so much.”

My supervisor who is paid by the hour and isn’t allowed overtime, has to leave now.

“Oh, and get that sputum specimen, will you?”

What my supervisor doesn’t know and I don’t have the nerve to tell her, is that I have no idea how that sputum collection container works. Many years ago, you sucked on the end of the tubing to get the mucus from the lungs into the sterile cup. She said this one hooked up to the suction machine.

I go into the new patient’s room and close the door to the noise of the hallway.

“Hi (her name). You have the same name as my mother. I’m your nurse and my name is Linda.”

She stops moaning and opens her eyes into a squint.

“You’re my nurse? Where am I? I wish I hadn’t left Montana. I had such a nice farm but I sold it when my husband died. I wish I hadn’t left Montana.”

“You fell and broke your hip. You had surgery. Do you remember falling?”

“Oh did I have surgery? I don’t remember falling? I wish I hadn’t left Montana.”

Suddenly the door opens and the aide sticks her head in.

“You have four patients wanting pain pills. I’m tired of answering lights for the third time asking for pain pills again!”

Also, the IT man needs me to sign back on the computer. Suddenly we have a few minutes to discuss what it’s like working here while we wait for the computers to reinstall and update. I spill my story about almost quitting today.

He says as a nurse he has, “Been there. Done that.” He encourages me not to give up. He says he’s noticed what a good job I do here, and he believes that I’m everything I say I am! He agrees that it might not be (might not be) productive to try and change some people’s opinion of me but to let it go and to believe in myself. (Sandy’s words echo again…).

To make this long story short, I did all the assessments and admissions. The patient’s mother showed me how to get the sputum specimen, and the agency nurse gave out all the pain pills while I got her shift report ready. I gave the IT man a card about my book, and said goodnight to each of my patients as I passed by their doorways.

"Will you be back tomorrow?" a few ask. "No. I'm off."

Jim says he has supper ready at home…

Take Care on the Journey,

February 20, 2007

Peace And Joy

"Great peace have they who love God's law and nothing shall offend them." Psalm 119:165

My sister, Sandy, will remember how grandma used to quote this verse a lot. I don't think either of us understood why grandma liked this verse. When I saw it mentioned on a friend's blogsite, I sent her a question and her response has really touched my heart!

I wish I had more time this morning to relate a wonderful experience that just happened to me, but I have an appointment regarding another job that should bring me a little more Joy and Peace. I’ll be brief.

At another friend’s blogsite, I commented to her article never expecting a reply. In fact, I almost missed ever finding her response to my question. Olive is the sister of my friend, Floyd, but I didn’t know she knew me that well. She even referred to me as a “special friend”. I hope you will skip over to Olive’s blogsite when you are finished here. Her kind response brought tears to my eyes!

Olive had no way of knowing that I have recently been feeling extremely hurt by the actions of someone who misrepresented me at work causing me great pain and heartache. At a place where I try to be an “angel nurse” to my patients, and a loyal professional co-worker to everyone, someone told my supervisor lies and presented a situation totally out of context. My supervisor reacted without even asking for my side of the situation resulting in a response I did not deserve.

I’ve been so upset and angry that I’m sure you, my dear readers, have felt the pain. In fact, several of you have been urging me to get out of the situation immediately. Privately, my family and friends have been sending lots of support and love but....
Lately, I’ve been soooo irritable to my loving husband, and I've been honking the car horn at many innocent drivers on the highway.

Today, I want to thank Olive for allowing her angel to intervene and provide words of wisdom she did not know would mean so much.

Her reply included how we sometimes feel offended and hurt by the actions of others. (How did she know?) But, if we understand and remember the way God loves us, we can forgive and feel peace and joy.

Forgiveness can bring peace as I've tried to present in my book, "Dusty Angels and Old Diaries", but sometimes we need a gentle nudge to practice what we preach.

This doesn't mean I won't look for a less stressful job and take some time to get back on my usual sweet loving path, but today I needed an "angel hug" and Olive was there.

Her blogsite is http://maidenbringerofpeace.blogspot.com The response was posted on Feb. 17, 2007 at 3:55 - There's that 55 number again!

Take Care on the Journey,

February 14, 2007

Winter in Columbus, Ohio

Summer to winter on the patio!
(Click on pictures for larger view.)
There are tulip bulbs under the snow!)

A Cheery Good Snowy Morning to My Faithful Readers

As I sit snuggle down in front of the computer in a warm winter robe, the wind and snow howl outside my window. A small evergreen tree bends low, and snowdrifts cover the first few branches close to the ground. For those who’ve wintered blizzards and severe weather, this is expected February behavior. Those who live in the south might shiver and thank goodness they are basking in warm sunshine.

This morning I’m thankful that I have the day off and can watch the car get encased in a large crust of ice and snow. I can’t say the same for yesterday. It was one of those 5 a.m. dashes to scrape off the ice and hope the door handle didn’t break off as I tried to pull the frozen car door open. AAA gave a report that instructed one to use a cigarette lighter to unfreeze the door handle before pulling on it. Obviously, whoever wrote that story has never stood in 40 mile-hour wind in 20 below 0 wind chill trying to keep a lighter flame on long enough to thaw out metal! That’s like lighting a cigarette on top of Mt. Hood. (Can't say I've ever tried that, but you know what I mean...)

Oh well, my car door was on the wrong side of the wind and wasn’t stuck shut so I “de-froze” the car the easy way. I started the engine, turned all the fans on high and ran back indoors while the inside of the car warmed up. Then the windows were at least slushy after I got through the 6 inches of snow and the 2-inch layer of encrusted ice in between!

Thankfully, my drive to work is only about 5 miles ‘in town’ and once back home, Valentine’s Day gifts for Jim were put off until tomorrow.

During the night I got up to check the house and discovered a beautiful card and small diamond necklace waiting for me on the table. He never forgets his Angelwings!

I’ve created a list of things to appreciate in winter weather. Hope you can identify!

A pair of black rubber boots that come to your knees and go over your shoes. Somewhere over the years I lost those big black boots used for milking Albert’s cows and my goat, Beulah!

The idiot light that informs you when the window washer is low so when that semi truck slathers your windshield with muddy salty slush and you hit the washer button, you don’t just hear a little buzz and nothing else happens.

Rearview window de-icier. I’m telling you, we did not have those on the car when we lived in Missouri as teenagers. Grandma used to run out with a bucket of hot water and splash it all over the car. Precious water that Sandy and I carried from the spring in the woods and heated on the big bellied stove in the middle of the living room! I can’t remember what was important enough to cause such a waste of water.

Dogs that didn’t have to be put on a leash and walked in the back yard each time they had to go potty. Back then, Lassie would scratch on the door and you’d say, “Hurry back.”

I’m sure you can think of more to add. If so, please feel free to leave a comment for everyone to enjoy.

Jim saw a Grey Wolf in our little settlement about 4 a.m. as he was returning from an all-night run with medicines. (A job he does part-time.) It was extremely cold and all the ponds were frozen so he figures the wolf was headed for the creek nearby. We went out later and saw its footprints in the snow. He said if he had a steak, he would have thrown it out for the wolf to eat.

Speaking of work. Jim has a second job interview for a maintenance job tomorrow Thursday, Feb. 15 at 2 p.m. We wish him the best!!!!! He passed the first interview last week. It would be at a large retirement community near Columbus.

I’ve created an outline for my second book. Funny, I have a title before I have the book written. It will be called, “Baby Crying. Living with Dementia and Alzheimers." I’ve started the research and plan to complete this within the next two months. In case I haven’t already explained it. Women with dementia often hear a baby crying and think it’s their child. They will risk getting out of bed with a broken hip to find the crying baby. And, it's usually a woman who lost a baby many years before. Women with latent stages of Alzheimers won’t even remember they had children. The book will be much more comprehensive and hopefully, another page-turner!

There’s much for each of us to do today. That includes you, my reader, who is quite likely reading this at work and need to get back to business. Hopefully I haven’t kept you too long on my little journey today. I’ll be back soon…if the creeks don’t rise. (It’s in the book.)

Take Care on the Journey,

February 9, 2007

Anna Nicole Smith

Yesterday when co-workers gathered around the TV gasping with horror at the news of Anna Nicole's death, I stupidly asked, "Who was Anna Nicole Smith?"

It seems she had many friends/followers. I asked myself why, and have yet to find a good answer. Is someone considered a friend because they are in the news a lot? But, even the Ohio Gopher has come out of his burrow to watch this news. He says she was a "Celebrity Paradox".

Well, whoever she was to so many people, her death has made me think about my friends and who they are and what my definition of a friend is.

An article about friends caught my eye yesterday. You’ve heard it before…

“If you wouldn’t say it to your best friend, don’t say it to yourself.” For instance, you wouldn’t tell your best friend they were ugly or fat, so don’t say it to yourself.

Suddenly, I thought to myself. “Who is my best friend?” “Do I have one?”

Immediately several of you reading this might sit up a little straighter and offer, “But I’m your friend!”

I doubt I’d tell anyone they were fat or ugly – while some of you might not mind doing so if the time was right - . So, my definition of friend might be different from yours.

My good friend, Floyd, writes that God is our best friend. I believe that God is Floyd’s best friend and it’s Floyd’s desire to serve Him above all else. This is important to Floyd. Why? The answer is not my story today.

The question calls out to me. Why do I call Floyd my good friend? Before he started a website, we had contact only every few years and that was to catch up on family things. I knew his wife, Tania, better than I knew and understood Floyd.

The answer? I define a "friend" as 'someone who does not hurt me'. Floyd has never hurt me. We have been tested and it did not happen. He might not be my best friend – only because I reserve that for females and relatives. And, he might not be a confidant or loving friend – because I reserve that for my husband or family – but he is my definition of a friend.

Of course, you have to understand my meaning of hurt and that is not the purpose to today’s writing either. Others might not have the same definition of a friend. I think my sister Sandy would think of a friend as someone she can have fun with. My husband might define a friend as someone he can trust with his life (few indeed).

Yesterday morning at about 5 a.m., my friend was the exhaust from the cold motor of the car. My mind was in a muddle about having to get up at such an unearthly hour, all alone, in the bitter night wind chill and go to a job that has me upset and discouraged.

I was worried about an incident that had happened when I grumbled about a nurses aide for sitting at the desk instead of working. I knew she had been very angry at me and did not let me explain anything. I knew she had written a note to my supervisor and, even though I KNEW I had done nothing wrong, I realized quickly that I don’t have as many FRIENDS in high places as she does because she has worked there for many years. (Worked?) Oh well. You read the story.

As I sat in the freezing car yesterday morning, I couldn’t move my right hand to put the gear into “R” and back out of the driveway. Suddenly I felt like I didn’t have a friend in the word. Maybe I hadn’t said enough morning prayer, but my hand just wouldn’t move toward the gear shift. My friends all seemed far away and sound asleep. Who could I trust? Then I did ‘pray’. I asked for my angel to show herself in the whiff of heat exhaust coming from a chimney vent in the roof of the house. (Remember how the chimneys all do that when it’s cold?)

Well, nothing happened. The clock on the dash told me the minutes were ticking by and I was going to be late for work if I got there at all. I sat there with my fingers tucked under my legs to keep them warm. The car still running and I was running late!

Suddenly (you guessed it), the wind changed a little and the car exhaust blew toward a small pine tree that stood in front of the car. And, behind that tree was a streetlight. As the exhaust from the CAR hit the tree, it exploded into thousands of brilliant lights as it reflected in the street light behind the tree! I’m sure my angel sent that display to show me that I’m never alone and help is always on the way!

When I got to work, it was worse than I had expected. I won’t go into the sad details but the memory of that cloud of lights helped me through another difficult day at work.

I’m not finished with my thoughts about friends (and I hope you won’t think this is too long and stop reading now.)

Can you list your friends?

Faithful Friend _________ Best Friend ____________ Loving Friend ___________ Trusting Friend _________ Occasional Friend _____________ Long-time Friend __________ Former Friend __________ Casual Friend __________ Confident ___________ New Friend __________ Meaningless Friend __________ Respected friend __________

Funny! How can one have a Meaningless Friend? That’s my point. All friends need a definition. Friends change. Sometimes we don’t even realize someone is our friend until we are in need and they are there for us! I think of Bonnie and someone named Lee who doesn't even know he's my friend. (Don't ask.)

Briefly, while I have many friends in the same category, I’ll list a few that come to mind. Juanita is a new friend. (I so enjoyed her response to my article, Send Funny Jokes.) Johnnie is my faithful friend of many years. Jim is my confidant and loving friend. Floyd and Tania are among my trusting friends. Teresa (my former boss) is a respected friend. My children are a great description of the best in friendship. Sweet Katy (Billy’s wife) is a special friend. Shelley (Philip's wife) is my friend because she is my son's wife and I love her too. My sister Sandy is always there for me even though we have been through many storms and have had ups and downs. She is a loyal friend, best friend and faithful friend. Grace (from Missouri) is an old friend. Of course, my dog Sheba is rated high up there in the friend list! She is as loyal as they come!

Most of all I'm blessed to say that my husband is a friend who knows me so well that he would never do anything or say things that would hurt me. I can boast that he is all of the above in what I value in a friendship.

There are many of my friends who would nudge me to list God as my best friend. Believe me folks, for most of my life I would have announced that from the housetop! I’m not saying that things are different now. It’s just that by my definition of friendship, I need that physical ness (not sure that’s a word) (actions, physical form) to get the strength to lift my right arm for that gearshift.

Lastly, I promise my readers that I am your friend. Some of you don’t know and may never know me, but it is my desire to be kind to you and never hurt you. If by my words, you feel betrayed or hurt, please know that I would reach out and take your hand in love and peace. It is not by our choosing do we travel this path together.
(Or is it?)

When we feel that our “friend” has let us down, we may strike out in fear and anger. It is not against you or them (my friend) but against the fear within.

Take Care on the Journey


February 7, 2007

Send Funny Jokes, Please

A funny movie would work too!

After my last posting titled, “Columbus Dispatch”, my loving son the Spanish Professor called to ask how I’m doing. He had read the story with a bit of concern for his usually strongest-woman-in-the-world mother.

“I’m okay. I’m really just fine,” I assured my oldest child. "My back is better, thank goodness for Motrin!

"I'm able to sit up and take nourishment," - as John M. from Berrien Springs likes to say when asked how he's doing.

I use this website as a way to vent. As a sounding board. As a lesson in life. To encourage and offer a helping hand and listening ear. I may need to have a better sense of humor, but Dusty Angels is always the TRUTH through my eyes.

Last Monday was probably the worst career day of anybody at my job. New computer programs can send anybody to Mars and back, but in this case, it was imperative that we get the job done so our patients could get proper care, and the stress all over the building was like a pressure cooker.

We should have all gotten on the loudspeaker and did a hip-hip hooray at the same time to ease the tension!

Several happy things to report today...

I found some new scripting in the snow and it looks like our favorite Ohio Gopher has been out and about. The message was saved HERE. Don't save the site to your favorites from "HERE" but please add this blogsite to your favorites. http://autumnspring55.blogspot.com/ (The email at the top of his site should read, hireaveteran@usa.com ) You won’t want to miss his occasional outings from the burrow!

I got an email yesterday from a VERY favorite person and former boss I had lost track of. She was owner of Teresa’s Country Homes in Berrien Springs, Michigan. Her eldercare homes were the BEST in Berrien County. It was a joy and pleasure to work for her. (She’s in my book for those who had read, Dusty Angels and Old Diaries and she hasn’t even read the book yet.)

EnglishRose Photography got a nice break from someone whose name I can’t mention. But such kindnesses are few and far between. Thank-you Mike!

Our landscape got about 4 inches of beautiful soft snow last night. Today it sparkled over the land bringing out all the colors of the rainbow. It helped ease the bitter single digit cold and bone chilling wind. I wish you could have watched Sheba running and almost dancing through the back yard. Finally, she just lay down and put her nose into the blanket of snow. No pictures. It was just a tad too cold for me to spend that long outside.

Here's a joke. Jim didn't laugh but I'll tell it anyway...

Q. Why didn't the elephants want to play cards in the jungle?

A. There were too many cheetahs.

Haa Haa Hee Hee

I’ll repeat the first paragraph because it’s so important.

I found some new scripting in the snow and it looks like our favorite Ohio Gopher has been out and about. The message was saved HERE. Add this blogsite to your favorites. http://autumnspring55.blogspot.com/ (The email at the top of his site should read, hireaveteran@usa.com ). You won’t want to miss his occasional outings from the burrow!

Hurray for hubby James - the only gopher in the Midwest to have a website!

Take Care on the Journey,


February 6, 2007

Columbus Dispatch

After a very bad day at work today, I’m temped to post an ad in the Columbus Dispatch that reads...

“Experienced, compassionate, reliable LPN seeks challenging position in health care setting to work in harmony with a cheerful, dependable supervisor and friendly helpful co-workers."

The last three days working at the local nursing home has made me question if I’m ever going to find a job where my co-workers have the same care-giving goals that I do. Where my immediate boss knows how pronounce my (difficult) last name and communication skills are at least above average. A place where appreciation for a job well done is recognized in some small way other than employee-of-the-month!

Instead, the staff I am supposed to be supervising sit at the nurses station and complain because a patient turns on a call-light for the second time in 10 minutes. They ask for the keys to the narcotic room so they can "wash their hands" when there are 25 other sinks on the unit. They toss stinky gloves into my med cart trash when there are at least 80 other trash cans on the unit, and they leave dinner trays on the bedside table for hours while they sit at the desk and gossip. They don’t inform me when they’re going on break (all at the same time) and complain because call lights are on when they return.

My supervisor calls off, and no one tells me she won’t be in today to note orders and assist with a new computer program that is complicated and unpredictable! The doctor who wrote orders in the morning came back in the afternoon and showed me his charts with the morning orders still there.

"I know you're swamped," he says apologetically as he writes more orders.

All this and more yesterday during a long 14-hour stress-filled day. I stayed late at the request of another supervisor who said she was 'going home early' and needed me to enter orders into the testy new computer program that I had NOT been trained for. But, this couldn't be done until after the night nurse (an agency nurse) got there and I gave her report and showed her the ropes.

I’m tired. I’m discouraged. My back hurts from standing at the med cart for hours and then stressing at the computer. My throat is sore from not eating or drinking all day yesterday. Okay, I'm angry about the situation too. Even reading my friend Floyd's website made me feel guilty because of my unsettled mindset today.

Maybe I should post another ad in the
Columbus Dispatch and see what kind of response I get. Maybe I have it all wrong. This one seems to fit what facilities are hiring these days. Why didn't I think of it? (Darts intended.)

"Tired, experienced LPN seeks non-challenging job with a supervisor who doesn’t care (about me) and co-workers who could care less. Willing to take long breaks and complain about everything and everyone. Able to gossip freely and talk for long periods of time on my cell phone. Good at telling others how to do their job and finding excuses not to do my work. Comfortable with leaving call lights on until I feel like answering them and then telling the patients that I’ll be back later to take them to the bathroom. Enjoy sitting at the nurses’ station chatting to visitors about the weather and laughing at any employee who looks like they might be working too hard. Greatest strength is making fun of others and biggest weakness is taking too long for cigarette breaks. I walk very slow and take my time in the bathroom. I call off without notice and never volunteer for extra shifts. I bring my kids in to work when the babysitter doesn’t show up or schools have a snow day. I clock out after one more break and don't give report if they don't ask."

Please reply to these ads noting which type of nurse you would like to have.

Email me at I-don’t-give-a-care-bear-nurse.com or


Take Care on the Journey,

February 2, 2007

My Eyes Aren't What They Used to Be...

This is not to say, “I’m sorry” or “I was wrong”, (or to bring up too many old ghosts!), but it seems that most who’ve read my blog about the Worthington Church feel that I was being critical. Actually, even the kindest of members from that SDA Church have told me that I was unfairly judging its people and standards.

That’s not to say that no one supported my position (Katy, Sandy, BAP and Floyd). They give me credit for viewing my story through MY eyes, but others say when viewed through THEIR eyes, they feel hurt and accused.

At first, I argued that I was presenting the difference between yesterday’s church and today’s new rules and did not mean to be critical, but after a lengthy phone call from someone far removed (Neil) who said he took my reflections personally and did not like what he heard/read, I decided that my eyes must not be what they used to be!

In case you’re thoroughly confused by now, even though my eyes have gone from bi-focal to almost tri-focal, I can see that many will never understand that I didn’t mean to be critical. Few are going to view my stories through MY eyes. I accept that.

My family and friends already know that I’m my own worst critic and that my goal in life is to love from my heart. To give freely and unconditionally.

Like my eyes, I’m not perfect, but I’m working to improve myself all the time and surely do not ever intend to hurt anyone.

I enjoy reading reflections from my friend, Floyd, who writes from the heart, his views on life and living. Sometimes, like my sister Sandy said, they are too long for one sitting, but the articles always carry golden nuggets of truth and wisdom.

PS You may be stuck with this story for a few says. I'm scheduled for 6 12-hour days of nursing in a row. Leave me messages of strength!!!

Take Care on the Journey, ~Linda