September 25, 2008

It's Not My Fault

Breaking News... After I posted this article last night, the financial and political situation has gotten worse. Another crash of a major banking institution during the night; WaMu collapses! It is reported that McCain only muddied the waters at the White House yesterday on the $700 billion dollar bail-out issue; Obama may be the only candidate to show up at the $55 million dollar debate planned for tonight; Palin has faltered on foreign policy issues during interviews and people don't know if the doors will be open when they head to their bank this morning...

The last few days the words, "It's not my fault" have become familiar excuses in the news as the leaders of our country try to agree on a plan to bail out mortgage companies in trouble to the tune of at least (how do I write such a big number?) $700 billion dollars.

I haven't heard one person say, "I'm part of the problem" when most of them ARE the problem. I have no expectation that things will get better in Washington because they have forgotten the Golden Rule and simply cannot accept responsibility for their own actions.

While I'm pretty sure that nothing I say will help fix Washington or keep my mortgage company in business, it would be nice to know that we could live and learn how not to act from what's going on in our country today. Do we treat others as we want to be treated? Do we take responsibility for our own actions and reactions?

We laugh at McCain and Obama for going tit for tat, but sometimes treat others the same way if they step on our toes. Instead of choosing to hate someone, or feeling anger toward them or getting depressed about a situation, we should think about our reactions and emotions and take responsibility for them. Of course it's so much easier to place blame. To find imperfections in others. To say they made a mistake or misdeed. I wonder when it become so acceptable to place responsibility for our emotions and actions on others?

For example, last night President Bush spoke at 9 p.m. totally messing up all the millions of evening prime-time programs that were timed to be recorded while folks were finishing up the business of the day. We had set Criminal Minds and CSI NY to record at the same time so, when the president came on, we turned off the TV knowing our shows would be recorded and we would watch them later. Being tired, we went to bed early.

You can guess what happened. Tonight when we sat down to watch our recorded programs, the last 15 minutes got cut off as the recording stopped at the top of the hour. Now whose fault was that?

"Blasted Bush", yelled my husband...

In other areas, but along the same line, I would like to report that I had a very nice BIRTHday. (Sept. 3). I did have some expectations that did not get met, but I chose not be to disappointed. I was happy that my kids remembered to call. (Mothers worry about that because it isn't acceptable to call and remind them about OUR birthday.) I even got a card from youngest son before my birthday! Hubby spread the party out over several days. Many friends sent nice birthday cards and emails.

But, several people whom I thought would remember, did not contact me. (OK my mother being one of them.) And, seven of my eight siblings also choose not to celebrate my birthday with me. I could have let that spoil my joy of the day or, with good reason, held it against them, but I chose to pass on those feelings. Perhaps they didn't remember. Maybe they don't even know when my birthday is - although it's in the book - LOL. Maybe they are not feeling strong enough emotionally to give something back on such a personal day. My point being is that if I let it bother me, I'm the only one who suffers.

Speaking of my mother. She fell and broke her hip on September 12. Emergency surgery was done and she is in rehab now. Doing very well, she says. Already taking some steps around the room.

One last example of how we can choose our reactions. This morning my husband committed the 'unpardonable sin" in our house.

I woke up at 6:40 a.m. and his side of the bed was empty. I jumped out of bed to find that his briefcase was gone from the kitchen chair. I ran to the window and saw that his car was gone.

He hadn't woke me up to kiss me goodbye!

Looking in the bathroom for a note that said, "didn't want to wake you" and then running back to the kitchen table to look for a note that said, "you were sleeping so peacefully", and finding nothing, I slowly walked back to the bedroom planning my reaction.

Yep. My reaction. I had many choices. For one split second I considered getting dressed and showing up at his breakfast place to confront him in front of everybody. (Yea, imagine that.) Then I thought I could call him when he got to work and really make him feel bad. Really rub it in. (Yea, that's me too. ha ha). Lastly, I decided that he must have really been tired and without me to push him out he door, he was probably running late too. Or, as I suspected was more the truth, he simply didn't want to disturb my peaceful sleep.

As I drifted back to sleep I knew I'd call him at work because it was important for me to make a statement. I would suggest that if he doesn't want to wake me up, he should leave a cup or something by my bathroom sink so I'd know he didn't "forget" me. It's important for me to know he didn't "forget" to kiss me goodbye.


Later, I called him at work and mentioned that I missed my morning kiss. (Maybe I put just a little pout in my voice.) He said he touched my foot and I didn't move. But (his words), "You were purring so peacefully, I didn't want to take you from your sweet dreams." However, he assured me this will never happen again. Those of you who know my hubby have no doubt that it won't.

Sweet dreams to all of you.

Take Care on the Journey,
~Linda

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